I don't like the feel of how it looks!

I don't like the feel of how it looks! This might seem crazy but different patterns on clothing feel different to me by looking at them.

I have always found it hard to find pyjamas that are comfortable. In 2020, I found some. They are the most comfortable pyjamas in the world for me. I could stay in them all day!

I have quite a few pairs of pjs, and if I were to be blindfolded, they would all seem the same. When I look at them though, they all feel completely different. As I write this post, I am waiting for a particular pair of pyjamas to finish in the tumble dryer. No other pair will do. This pair is covered in lots of brightly coloured cats. They can't fail to make me calm and relaxed.

There are some garments that I know I won't be able to wear simply because of how the design makes me feel. But, it isn't always down to whether I like how they look. For example, I had a dress with a beautiful tapestry design. I loved the visual effect, but because the pattern was printed and not sewn onto the fabric, I was unable to tolerate it. The irony is that had it been sewn, I wouldn't have been able to tolerate that sensation physically.

When my brain processes a visual input, the messages it gives me are so strong that it is very overwhelming. The bright cat pyjamas give my brain a happy signal, probably as it knows how calm I feel stroking my cat. In the same way, it sees an embroidered pattern and knows that this has the potential to cause me discomfort.

Processing at this level might seem extreme, especially if you have not experienced it. I guess in many ways, it is a survival strategy to stay regulated.