How it feels to go Christmas shopping - and tips!

I remember the annual Christmas shopping trip to Oxford Street with my grandma. It was a tradition I enjoyed partly because of its predictability—and partly because it meant a slice of chocolate cake and a glass of milk at Selfridges Cafe. Even at six, though, I felt an unease during this festive pilgrimage. I didn’t know why back then, and it wasn’t a time when kids’ feelings were discussed.

Looking back, I can still feel the heat of the tube, smell the tobacco lingering in the seats, and hear the piercing squeal of the brakes, punctuated by the electrical buzz of the rails. Shops weren’t as crowded as today, but as Christmas decorations and musical displays became more common, I felt overwhelmed. The clashing sounds disoriented me, leaving my brain unsure of where to focus. By my teenage years, I’d grown to avoid large shopping centers, though I didn’t understand why at the time. Now I know it was sensory overload—a feeling that’s followed me into adulthood, where I’ve had to learn strategies to handle the sensory demands of shopping.

This week marks Purple Tuesday, when stores make efforts to be more accessible for those with disabilities. Sadly, it’s not widely advertised and often falls on a weekday. A weekend event could be more impactful, offering children a chance to experience shopping in a way that’s less overwhelming.

It is important to remember that every autistic person is going to cope with shopping very differently. On the whole I only do grocery shopping online because it is simply too overwhelming. However, occasionally I do go shopping and here are some tips which I find make it manageable. 

Timing – I go very early in the day before shops get busy and make it as quick as possible. 

Plan – I look online before I go to shops so I have an idea of what I want to buy and what shops I need to go to. 

Sensory – I always wear noise-cancelling earphones to reduce the overload, and sometimes I play music, too. I also have light adaptive glasses which help to reduce any visual stress.

Checkout – I opt for self-checkouts as the queues are often shorter and less interaction is needed. 

Rehearse – If I know that I need to order something or talk to someone, I will rehearse what I need to ask to help with my confidence and reduce stress. 

Reward – Get yourself a small reward – mine is often a coffee when I get home. 

Each person’s needs and preferences are unique, so try different combinations of these strategies to find what works best for your child. Over time, you might find a comfortable routine that makes shopping easier to manage.

For more tips and advice on dealing with Christmas and anxiety, check out our books Parenting Rewired and Autism & Anxiety at https://www.autability.co.uk/our-books