Dealing with disappointment at Christmas

However much preparation and planning we put in, sadly, there is always the possibility of disappointment, which often occurs from the unexpected. Whilst there is little or nothing we can do to prevent unexpected changes, what we can do is support our children to try to understand why things change and prepare them for the unexpected as best we can.

You can prepare them for potential disappointments by discussing that plans might change, or not everything they want will happen. Use gentle, clear language like, "Sometimes, things don’t go exactly as planned, but we can still have a good time."

If your child is upset by something that they think hasn’t gone as they expected, then it is important to acknowledge their disappointment. Doing this can reduce some of the frustration that they will be experiencing. 

It can be helpful in the run-up to overwhelming events to share simple stories about times you were disappointed but found something good in the situation. This resilience modelling helps them appreciate that this is a feeling that everyone experiences and can be overcome.

Planning a “debrief” is also a good idea by using visual aids or simple prompts to help your child focus on what went well, which can help to change their mindset and give a positive outlook on their Christmas celebration.

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